Two languages in one head
The strangest blog I've stumbled on so far was a bilingual one; bilingual to the point where after finishing one sentence the author would translate into the other language. That is the only explanation I can think of for the strange now-making-perfect-sense, now-a-mass-of-strange-squiggly-words character of the entries.
How is it possible that a person can carry two linguistic systems in one tiny part of the brain? All research in this field suggests that such a person would experience violent head pains as two different grammatical systems vie for control of key cognitive functions. The person diagnosed with this unfortunate "bi-lingual disorder" can expect a severely impeded ability to communicate in either language, as well as a whole set of apparently unrelated side effects, such as diminished urinary continence, increased propensity to developing allergies, greater bone fragility and morbidly increased cholesterol. The only choice we have is to severely limit immigration to only the finest specimens, ones that would be able to carry this horrific burden of being now quite here, not quite there. This author would suggest males of caucasian descent over the age of 35.
My tongue is back out of my cheek.
Thought for the day: "go here. Read the section on the Pale Blue Dot."
How is it possible that a person can carry two linguistic systems in one tiny part of the brain? All research in this field suggests that such a person would experience violent head pains as two different grammatical systems vie for control of key cognitive functions. The person diagnosed with this unfortunate "bi-lingual disorder" can expect a severely impeded ability to communicate in either language, as well as a whole set of apparently unrelated side effects, such as diminished urinary continence, increased propensity to developing allergies, greater bone fragility and morbidly increased cholesterol. The only choice we have is to severely limit immigration to only the finest specimens, ones that would be able to carry this horrific burden of being now quite here, not quite there. This author would suggest males of caucasian descent over the age of 35.
My tongue is back out of my cheek.
Thought for the day: "go here. Read the section on the Pale Blue Dot."
posted by A. D. at 4:08 PM
2 Comments:
You know, my mom could speak two languages at once. When she would talk to my grandmother, they'd switch (sometimes mid-sentence) from English to German like mad. For example, "Blub blub bluck[German] but when I came to Canada, I got around it." This also was common in Quebec. I remember getting yelled at by a saleslady in English and in French: "Tu ne peux[? my French is rusty] pas do that here", etc. So it happens!
-Sara
Heh. A while back I found that I can say, with only slight exaggeration:
"I speak eight languages, six of them badly".
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